The brooding romantic lead.

A literary classic and a literal curse. 

The Misuse of Trauma as a Narrative Device in Romance

There’s a fine line between portraying a hurt character on a healing journey and creating an emotionally stagnant hot-mess. Unfortunately, too many modern authors bulldoze past that line, using trauma as a shortcut for depth rather than a meaningful exploration of a character’s growth. It’s a growing problem in the romance genre, one that actively undermines a reader’s experience.

Trauma is a complex part of the human experience, often rooted in larger societal structures like racism, classism, and economic instability. It thrives in environments filled with secrecy, shame, and silence. When used thoughtfully, trauma can deepen a story and lend authenticity to character development. When it’s poorly handled, often as a lazy plot device, it breeds generalizations, stereotypes, and abuse. 

This critique explores the writing and integration of trauma in two different fictional romance books:  I Hope This Finds You Well by Natalie Sue and The Neighbor Favor by Kristina Forest. I genuinely enjoyed and highly recommend reading these books, but I found it very interesting how the authors approached writing trauma very differently.

I Hope This Finds You Well represents, for me, a flawed industry norm where trauma is used to shortcut conflict. I saw this flaw in Beach Read by Emily Henry, Just for the Summer by Abby Jimenez, and other celebrated books in the genre. The Neighbor Favor, in contrast, stands out because of the thoughtful and wholistic way it approaches trauma.

Trauma as a Shortcut for Conflict

A common point of conflict in fictional romance is the resurfacing of an internal or external trauma. It manifests as abusive parents re-entering the main characters’ lives, abusive or harmful relationships, leaving characters afraid to love, or even societal issues like racism and ableism leaving a character vulnerable to harm. Whatever the traumatic event is, it can leave characters feeling like they aren’t good enough, don’t deserve love or fortune, or are inherently broken and harmful to the people around them. These traumatic pasts can lead to distracting logical plot holes, the annoying emergence of unnecessary characters, and stunted protagonists who fail to grow. All of these issues impact a reader’s ability to connect with and empathize with the author’s story, and this is exactly the issue for I Hope This Finds You Well by Natalie Sue.

~ I Hope This Finds You Well ~

Book Spoilers Ahead

I Hope This Finds You Well is a comical story on connection and healing, with a hint of romance thrown in for flair. Our protagonist, Jolene (33), is deeply flawed and chaotic, adding to the rawness and relatability of the story. In the beginning of the story, Jolene is accidentally given administrative access to the work server in her office, letting her spy on everyone’s messages, emails, and files. Jolene’s coworkers, who she initially loathes, become complicatedly human and relatable before her eyes as they all try to manage keeping their jobs during layoffs with their painful home lives. The story is enjoyable, and you get to see so much character development within Jolene’s immediate coworkers, understanding why they behave the way they do as the story progresses. The story, beyond coworker drama, also handles unmet personal dreams and immigrant family burdens and expectations well. A major flaw within the narrative though is Jolene’s trauma and how it manifests in the present.

When Jolene was 17, she forced her best friend to attend a high school party in the woods with her. Forced to drink and belittled by her classmates, Jolene’s best friend drunkenly leaves the party in a frenzy, tripping and hitting her head on a rock. She tragically dies right in front of Jolene without anyone else nearby to help. This event deeply impacted Jolene, leaving her depressed and unable to process and cope for over 15 years. She turns to isolation and alcoholism, believing she is too flawed and weird to have any hope and joy in her life. This piece of trauma becomes a major point of tension in the story, impacting Jolene’s personal and professional life. She pushes away her romantic interest, the cute new HR guy in the office, and also conducts workplace misconduct trying to prevent the news of her trauma being spread around the office.

Initially, the author tried to build up to the trauma reveal. In the beginning, we only learn that Jolene is an alcoholic with no friends who fails at forming deep bonds with her coworkers. We hear Jolene’s internal narrative that she feels undeserving of friendship, and we get several hints that Jolene genuinely believes she killed her best friend. This unexplained self-loathing annoyingly continues for half of the book.

When the traumatic past is finally unveiled, it falls flat. Jolene managed 15 years without confronting or facing any form of her trauma, stunted all the way through deeply transformational moments like college and starting a new career. She entirely failed to make any friends or acquaintances, which, beyond being unrealistic, felt entirely unbelievable for her character. It also felt cliché and exaggerated that she would consider herself her best friend’s murderer, when A) her friend died in a freak incident and B) her bully classmates and unresponsive adult figures all failed her in the circumstance. 

The author failed to successfully sell the character of Jolene to her audience, which is tragic because the relationship-building and familial healing elements of the story were incredibly captivating. Trauma over loss and grief can impact us in deep and strange ways, but readers fail to understand why Jolene’s trauma stunted her for so many years. We also failed to adequately see Jolene take accountability for her actions and properly apologize for the damage she caused. Instead, we see a character whose trauma is used to excuse behavior rather than to explore growth, robbing the story of its emotional payoff. Instead of deepening the narrative, the trauma becomes a crutch that weakens it.

~ The Neighbor Favor ~

Book Spoilers Ahead

In contrast, The Neighbor Favor by Kristina Forest handles trauma with nuance and care. The story is a pure past-connection neighbor romance. It touches on the secret pen pals, fan-turned-romantic interest, and the “teach me to date” motifs and tropes commonly enjoyed in the romance genre. Nick, a disgruntled author that goes by a pseudonym, receives a fan email from Lily, a sweet reader trying to make her own way in the publishing world. Through genuine and vulnerable conversations, they become pen pals and romantic feelings begin to form. Months later, Nick suddenly ghosts Lily, and they go on with their lives with longing in their hearts. By some magical form of serendipity, Nick and Lily unknowingly become neighbors, and physical attraction begins to develop. Nick is the first to realize Lily is the same person he was writing to, and instantly his fear of commitment takes over, stopping the progression of the romance. Overall, the story is fun and engaging as readers slip into the romantic tension between Nick and Lily.

From the start, we learn about Nick’s troubled past. His father financially abused and strained the family since Nick’s youth, putting Nick in precarious and even dangerous situations for the sake of his gambling. His mother enabled Nick’s father’s behavior, forcing Nick to grow up in physical and emotional instability. This tumultuous upbringing led Nick to scrub his family’s presence from his life, moving around and writing under a pseudonym to prevent his father from reaching him or knowing anything about his life.

Initially, it seems like Nick’s trauma might stifle the story, but Forest takes a different approach. She embeds his pain into his character development. Readers learn that Nick vented his frustration with his dad in his first book, having his dad symbolize the villain in the fantasy he built. I found it poignant that his first book ends in a cliffhanger, representing the unresolved tension and pain he had for his parents. These metaphors and reflections show Nick is trying to cope with his parents failing to be safe and reliable figures in his life.

The most compelling aspect of Nick’s character is that he takes ownership of his healing. He doesn’t rely on Lily to fix him. He seeks therapy on his own, begins the difficult process of reconnecting with his mother, and makes peace with his past. His growth feels earned, and it strengthens his relationship with Lily rather than weighing it down. Nick’s trauma is real, but it doesn’t consume the narrative. 

The author captured my attention and respect through these intricacies. She not only explains Nick’s trauma, but shows its impact on every aspect of his life, down to his writing process. We intimately and easily dive into her characters, relishing the emotional connection developed along the way.  

What the Genre Needs

The romance genre needs more intention, care, and realism when handling trauma. Readers want to believe in the characters, to understand their pain, and to see them fight for something better. Trauma, when used well, can be a powerful tool for transformation. When used lazily, it cheapens the story and prevents the emotional connection readers crave.

I Hope This Finds You Well misuses trauma, relying on it to explain away behavior instead of allowing it to fuel growth. The Neighbor Favor shows how trauma can be a meaningful part of a story without taking it over. It gives us characters who are messy but capable, hurt but healing, and most importantly, worth rooting for.